A letter from Interweave

Thursday, January 10th, 2008

Interweave Knits Fall 2007Dear Eve,

Thank you for subscribing to Interweave Knits, and allowing us to spam your mailbox with useless crap every month! We sent you six renewal letters already, but we thought you might like a seventh in case the other six got lost somehow.

Aren’t you lucky? Because you’re a subscriber, you get to enjoy fantastic benefits! As well as paying us to spam you, you can also resubscribe for a truly exhorbitant price. (Exhorbitant is good! It means big, and big is always good.)

Whereas before you were forced to pay the staggeringly high price of $4.20 per issue, we’re offering you the low, low resubscription fee of a teensy $7.00 per magazine! Think of the savings! And by savings, we mean gouging.

Oh, and in case you thought otherwise from reading this letter, we’d just like to leave you a parting reminder that we think you’re a complete moron. Have a wonderful holiday.

Yours in form letters,
Eunny Jang’s peon #3
Editor (…’s peon #3)

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3 Comments to “A letter from Interweave”

  1. Dear Interweave,
    In appreciation of your truly outstanding customer service, I have decided to send you an i-payment in return for the e-junkmail.
    E’s imaginary assitstant

    Comment by
    January 10, 2008 @ 3:24 pm
  2. You are so lucky that my brand-new computer has a hole in the keyboard for draining spills. You keep doing this humor thing and I keep squirting Diet Coke…

    Comment by fleegle
    January 10, 2008 @ 3:51 pm
  3. That’s so good! If there is a funniest blog post contest in the future, I’ll have to remember this.

    Comment by Shirley
    January 12, 2008 @ 3:50 am

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